It may look harmless. It may sound harmless. It may even be considered entertaining by those unaware of its dangerous effects, but swearing is no laughing matter. Did you know that there is swearing in Kick-Ass? The Daily Mail knows.

Thanks to that bastion of UK society, we are all now forewarned of this potty-mouthed and puerile piece of filth, which could seriously offend and damage your children.

Especially when characters say words like "fuck" and "cock". And shoot people in the face.

Jane Goldman, Jonathan Ross's wife, wrote the screenplay for Kick-Ass, adapting Mark Millar's graphic novel series for the big screen. Including the violence and all the naughty words, her script contains a character called Hit-Girl, a young 11 year assassin who enjoys slicing people's legs off and shouting obscenities at villains.

Played by 13 year old Chloe Moretz, Hit-Girl is an offensive and corrupting icon; with purple hair, a revealing costume, and knives to boot, she represents everything wrong with today's society. Imagine that poor young teenager being forced by director Matthew Vaughan to carry cool guns, work with Nicolas Cage and run up walls - it's the kind of bullying that makes me (and the Daily Mail) want to vomit down our own necks.

My better informed colleagues report that in Australia, John Morrisey of The Family Association criticised Kick-Ass: "The language is offensive and the values inappropriate – without the saving grace of the bloodless victory of traditional superheroes". No bloodless saving grace? What does Miss Goldman think she's trying to do? Some form of satire?

Satirising superhero movies is all well and good. But does it really have to involve young, innocent children? And do they in turn have to swear? Fortunately, the BBFC have stepped in to brand this appalling creation with a 15 certificate because it "contains strong language, once very strong, & strong bloody comic violence".

I'm not allowed to comment on the film for another few weeks, but judging from that description and the trailer online, the BBFC clearly need to up their game - it's not enough to rate the film a 15 and prevent young children from seeing it. They should burn the film altogether. And then make a biopic about Richard Simpson, Daily Mail journalist and saviour of the little people of the world.

That way we won't have to watch a young girl whip the stuffing out of a bad guy before saying: "Okay, you cunts, let’s see what you can do now."

Until then, you can watch the red band Hit-Girl video below. Or see even more horrific and depraved trailers over here. None of which meet our approval whatsoever.

Kick-Ass is released on Friday 26th March.