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Balls of Fury * |
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Written by Ivan Radford
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Wednesday, 26 December 2007 00:00 |
 Director: Robert Ben Garant
Cast: Dan Fogler, Christopher Walken, Maggie Q, James Hong
Certificate: 12A
This film really wants to be Dodgeball, that modern king of sports comedy. It really isn’t. The title even sounds like a rip-off from Blades of Glory. But what could have been a marginally funny concept – FBI recruits former ping-pong prodigy Randy Daytona (Fogler) to infiltrate the world of arch bad person Feng (Walken) – makes for an incredibly pathetic film.
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Enchanted * * * * |
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Written by Ivan Radford
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Friday, 14 December 2007 00:00 |
 Director: Kevin Lima
Cast: Amy Adams, Patrick Dempsey, James Marsden, Susan Sarandon, Timothy Spall
Certificate: PG
Cool Runnings aside, Disney’s forays into the realm of reality haven’t always been brilliant. Then again, neither have their animated features of late. And that’s ignoring the horde of DVD sequels - the bastardised offspring of our childhood memories. Enchanted, then, is a hybrid of the two mediums; a pastiche of Disney past, it comes across as the company’s official retort to Shrek. The pleasant surprise is that it easily rivals the high standard set by the first in the Dreamworks series.
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The Nightmare Before Christmas 3-D * * * * * |
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Written by Ivan Radford
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Friday, 14 December 2007 00:00 |
 Director: Henry Selick
Cast: Danny Elfman, Chris Sarandon, Catherine O’Hara
Certificate: PG
Would you let Tim Burton read a bedtime story to your kids? On the basis of this? Hell yes. Initially released in 1993, The Nightmare before Christmas was a triumphant and unique project - the first stop-motion feature to be released. 14 years down the line, and it returns to grace our screens with a glorious third dimension - a lot easier on the eye than Ray Winstone in the buff. |
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Mr Magorium's Wonder Emporium * * * |
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Written by Ivan Radford
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Friday, 14 December 2007 00:00 |
 Director: Zach Helm
Cast: Dustin Hoffman, Natalie Portman, Zach Mills, Jason Bateman
Certificate: U As we age, our tolerance for whimsy decreases; the scale from one to vomiting has half the interim stages. Perhaps we lose touch with our inner child, but at some point we stop liking quite so much the schmaltzy stuff. Mr Magorium’s Wonder Emporium, the directorial debut of writer Zach Helm (Stranger Than Fiction), will clarify your boundaries.
Mr. Edward Magorium (Hoffman) is 243 years old and loves toys, selling magical contraptions to kids of all ages in his Wonder Emporium™. From balls that bounce to bears that hug, the store stocks everything. It even has a bald guy who lives in the basement. He’s called Bellini. He writes books.
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The Golden Compass * * * * |
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Written by Ivan Radford
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Friday, 07 December 2007 00:00 |
 Director: Chris Weitz
Cast: Dakota Blue Richards, Daniel Craig, Nicole Kidman, Ian McKellen, Eva Green
Certificate: 12A It doesn’t point North, and you can’t use it to draw circles, but they still rebranded Lyra’s shiny watch (it's an alethiometer, gosh darn it) as The Golden Compass for American audiences - the sad irony being that they don’t want to see the film anyway. The surprise is that this film is strangely unoffensive: there’s no religion, no blood, no swearing or nudity. They even stay relatively faithful to Pullman’s masterpiece.
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The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford * * * |
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Written by Ivan Radford
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Friday, 30 November 2007 00:00 |
Director: Andrew Dominik
Cast: Brad Pitt, Casey Affleck, Sam Rockwell
Certificate: 15 When Phillip Seymour Hoffman kicked the crap out of Tom Cruise in M:I:III, people rejoiced. Will the same occur with the climactic demise of Brad Pitt’s outlaw? Probably not. The reason is simple: The Assassination of Jesse James is as good as its title is long.
A Western charting the fluctuating relationship between Jesse (Pitt) and his biggest fan, Robert Ford (Affleck), its star is haunted by reputation, dogged by paranoia and chased by the authorities. Beginning to fear betrayal, Jesse turns upon his gang, hunting them down one by one. Brutal, psychotic and ever-alert, his flaws only serve to make him more human.
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Sleuth * * * * |
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Written by Ivan Radford
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Friday, 23 November 2007 00:00 |
 Director: Kenneth Branagh
Cast: Michael Caine, Jude Law
Certificate: 15 When Tim Burton’s remake of Planet of the Apes changed the classic ending, there was uproar in the film world. Dubbed a ‘re-imagination’, people were furious at the concept that someone could remake a movie without producing something completely identical. Branagh’s take on Sleuth, then, will upset people further: Pinter’s rewrite is a real remake - not a single syllable of Schaffer’s script remains.
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The Darjeeling Limited * * * * |
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Written by Ivan Radford
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Friday, 23 November 2007 00:00 |
 Director: Wes Anderson
Cast: Adrien Brody, Jason Schwartzman, Owen Wilson
Certificate: 15 Wes Anderson is an odd taste; you either like it or you don’t. The boundary isn’t one to be crossed or grasped; you can’t achieve the taste or have it thrust upon you. Some are born with it, some aren’t. Perhaps the Anderson funny bone is genetic. A bit like noses.
Blessed with their father’s wonky proboscis, three estranged brothers reunite on a hispiritual journey. Led by the eldest, Francis (Wilson), Peter (Brody) and Jack (Schwartzman) board the titular train in an attempt to reforge their relationship – a deep task indeed. Luckily, Francis brings along his assistant, Brendan. He has a laminating machine.
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American Gangster * * |
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Written by Ivan Radford
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Friday, 16 November 2007 00:00 |
 Director: Ridley Scott
Cast: Russell Crowe, Denzel Washington, Carla Gugino, Josh Brolin
Certificate: 18 Often quoted but never supported, Tarantino’s maxim that “directors don’t get better as they get older” may finally have been proven. American Gangster sees Ridley Scott back at the helm after a couple of critical flops (remember A Good Year?). Telling the true story of two hard-working men, this charts the rise of ‘70s gangster Frank Lucas (Washington), who elevates himself to the head of the heroin circuit when his mentor ‘Bumpy’ Johnson passes away. But this is also the tale of true blue cop Richie Roberts (Crowe); honest, divorced and training to be a lawyer, he is determined to bring down the drug lord.
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Beowulf * * |
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Written by Ivan Radford
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Friday, 16 November 2007 00:00 |
 Director: Robert Zemeckis
Cast: Ray Winstone, Angelina Jolie, Anthony
Hopkins, Robin Wright Penn, John Malkovich
Certificate: 12A
A CGI romp through a motion-captured epic of England past, Beowulf is a novel take on poetry. Written in old English, the stanzas have scared many a scholar over the years. Now, though, we have Neil Gaiman and Roger Avary to bring it bang up to date. Throw in Robert Zemeckis’ modern technology and the kids are the ones it will frighten; with monsters ripping the heads off humans, this is definitely NOT a 12A film. And that’s without mentioning the naked Ray Winstone.
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